“Made in Scotland, From Girders”

…is a famous advertising slogan used in the 70s for Irn Bru, the Scottish soft drink that tastes a bit like, well, iron girders. I read a fascinating article today though which tickled my nostalgia for a romantic past before digitalisation and automation. It turns out the recipe for Irn Bru is only known by 2 people in the entire world (and for that reason they never fly together on the same plane). One of those people is company chairman Robin Barr whose great grandfather came up with the Irn Bru recipe in 1901. It has not changed in 108 years, and Robin Barr still every month enters a sealed room at the company’s HQ in Scotland where he combines the 32 different ingredients making up the drink, mixing them in a huge vat containing enough mixture for 8000 litres of the stuff. Robin Barr is soon to stand down as chairman of A.G. Barr, the company which makes Irn Bru, but he will continue for the time being to come in monthly to mix the drink. Eventually, he admits, he will pass the recipe on to his daughter, who will then take over mixing duties. What a brilliant, romantic way of running a business.

It’s made me thirsty… thirsty for a drink made from girders!

P.S. For anyone worried that both people who know the Irn Bru recipe might die from swine flu, taking the recipe with them, they needn’t fear, as it is also stored on paper in a secret, secure bank vault somewhere in Scotland.

Who’d be a Politician?

Take a long hard look at this picture:

These are four MPs instigated in the latest ‘expenses’ scandal, having supposedly exploited the system for their own benefit (read HERE). Now, I’m pretty sceptical about the moral integrity of our politicians, mostly because their lives are so rigourously divided between what’s ‘public’ and what’s ‘private’ – the point being that when acting publicly they are supposed to uphold strong moral standards, but what they do in private is ‘their own business’. This is obviously absolute stupidity, as moral character, like religious faith, is either all or nothing – it is who you are, not what you do. The idea that you can turn ‘on’ moral standards when acting publicly, if you don’t have them privately, is so ridiculous as to border on lunacy.

Nonetheless, I want to open up another front of attack on our beloved politicians. Looking at the picture above, who the heck would want to become an MP if you end up looking like one of them? You can positively see the slime dripping off them. The word ’smarmy’ doesn’t quite do it justice.